Ask M.E. #11 Leave me alone

Dear M.E.,
How do you get people to leave you alone when you need some time by yourself? Like at the gym, at home . . . 
--Kelly

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Dear Kelly,
I would say be firmly honest. It can be hard to tell someone you don't want to talk, but you need to be your greatest advocate.

At the gym when your ladies approach, try being the one to start the conversation with, "Hey, I'd love to chat another time, but I really am trying to focus on my exercise here. Is there another time we can chat and catch up?" Let 'em answer quickly, then move on. Some people simply love to chat and can't fathom you wouldn't want to spend your gym time hearing about Jimmy and his rock collection.

At home Tell your family you need some time alone. Let them understand that's one of the things you need to fill your bucket. One thing that helps family members understand each other is to all take a personality test and share the answers with each other. It will help them understand you better, and you them. 

If being alone is something you NEED, then make arrangements where you will get it. My Grandma Jane was that way. About once a month she would get a hotel room and spend the night alone. She would write poetry and stories, crochet, pray. It was her time to refresh, connect with God and herself, and feel whole.

A few times a year I leave my family to attend writers conferences and retreats. Though I miss my family, it is good for my soul to have some time to be "me," to ponder and to nurture and strengthen my talents and abilities. It makes me a better me.

Just remember, you are your own advocate. Taking care of yourself is a priority. The better you feel, the better you can care for those around you.

Sincerely,
M.E.